Your Font, Your Self

Let me be the first to say - I love fonts.
Ridiculous fonts. Clean fonts. Cursive-y fonts. All of 'em. Choosing my font in my IM window took quite a bit of time. And I hate GChat and Gmail just a bit because they do not give me the plethora of fonts I enjoy. See? Not kidding about loving fonts.

A while back I had myself a little chat with my account director. I love the use of that word - chat. Like a bit of conversation rather than a gentle ass-reaming. In my agency the word "chat" has many different tonal uses. Just assume the "chat" is going to be about something YOU did wrong and you're OK.

I digress...

I hadn't worked with my account director all that much. Fresh from two major account losses, he was ready to kick ass and take names. Frankly, I like him - then and now. Like any old guard there are quirks. But all in all, the job gets done and the client rejoices.

I struggled with getting thrown into the deep end with an anvil on my ankle and not a lick of swimming ability. The learning curve with zero training is much longer than one with some training. He talked to me about getting promoted, what I needed to do and generally was supportive, interested and helpful.
Then the conversation wrapped up as such:
Him (vehement): "I hate the purple"
Me (confused): "Um, what?"
Him (getting more agitated by the word): "The purple font. I HATE IT."
Me (still confused): "Ohhh-kay"
Him (aggresively inquisitive):"How do you feel about it? Obviously you CHOSE it, so you like it. But I have to tell you, I HATE IT."
Me (getting the picture):"Clearly. I can change it you know."
Him (going all account director on me):"I don't want to tell you what to do. I just want you to realize what your font is saying. I mean, when you send an email ALL I SEE is PURPLE. No one will take you seriously with purple font."

Let me interrupt this clearly heartfelt moment to say that I have a client that sends emails in text language. Fun bits such as Thx, u, ur IN BUSINESS EMAILS. But purple words complete with correct spelling and grammar causes shame and humiliation.

Me (annoyed and ready to get this over with): "Erm, OK. I WILL CHANGE IT."
Him (Now too into my Outlook choices): "What about your font? What does that font say in an email?"
Me (see status above): "Are you asking me what Arial Narrow says about me as a person? As an employee? As a representative of the Agency? WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU ASKING ME ABOUT THE FUCKING FONT?!
Him (skeptical and generally hating every email I have ever sent): "Well does it come across how you would like to come across?"
Me (over. it.): "Let's see - it's not in random signs like webdings, people can read it, it's not Arabic." insert pause - "Yeah...no, I'm good."

Really? The font. Not the color (which yes, I changed), THE FONT. So glad we got to the important stuff.

No title, no travelling

It's been awhile. Truthfully putting advertising angst into words takes some time and a bit of oomph. And I haven't had much of either - time or oomph.

My position remains of the rock/hard place variety. Such is my lot in advertising life and I continually work to accept said lot. Although in the past month or so they have also taken on some of an administrative assistant quality. Not my most favorite part of this job. As a former admin, I can proudly say with absolute authority that I suck so horribly at being an admin. So horribly in fact that I don't have enough words to really drive this point home. Maybe it's because working for people who can do for themselves only they don't because why-the-hell-should-they makes me bonkers. As if I needed extra bonkers. Bonker card = full w/ waiting list.

But I digress. My fun and slightly annoying story of the day.

My online client has taken to calling me only when she cannot find my direct supervisor. Today she called me and the conversation went something like this:
Me: "Hi Client. How are you?"
Client: "Is your sup here today?"
Me: "No, I believe she heads out tomorrow."
Client: "Do you know when she will be arriving?"
Me: checking business card that clearly does not read Untapped Brilliance Travel Specialist
"Erm. I believe tomorrow evening. Sup will call you when out of the meeting they are currently in."
Client: "Are we still having that meeting @ 10am?"
Me: Check calendar and see I am not in said meeting so rather than sound like I have no idea what the hell they are talking about I reply: "Yes, I believe she just wants to touch base before said meeting since you were out on Friday"
Client: "Hmm, OK. Thanks Untapped."
Me: "Hey Client - I sent you like 12 emails on Friday, a few with super-important-exclamation points. Would you like me to send again so they are at the top of your inbox?"
Client: clearly bored by me and my non-useful answers "What? Yes, I saw the emails and attachments. Thank you. Good-bye"

Advertising. How can you not love it?

Today ... it may kill me

-Making major layout changes two days before we go on press
-Not have legal approval on an email that THE CLIENT was supposed to get
-Getting bitched at by same client on the delayed time to send the email
- Long meetings with someone who LOVES meetings and then asks for more
- Offers that make no sense
- Positioning that makes less sense
-Knowing that I have to do it all over again next quarter

ELVIS HAS LEFT... oh wait he's right here.

My client is in the building surely mucking it up for the other half of the business she's on.
She required some pretty extensive changes to a quick strike campaign that needs to be out in 2 days.

I cannot get her to
a) review said revisions
b) check her email or
c) leave the meeting.

The irony of having a client IN THE BUILDING and not reachable is not lost on me.
Not one bit.

Layoffs v. Layovers

Found out about agency layoffs during a layover.
Is that some sort of sign? Like if you find out about it on a layover then it's totally OK because you are not there therefore not laid off.
Which I am not.
So that's a relief.
Except that I was supposed to get a raise to go with my promotion. Clearly said raise will not be forthcoming.

Thankfully the Atlanta airport is beautiful at this time of year. And by beautiful, I mean huge with layovers at gates that are so far from each other you need a sherpa and mule to get to them.
Thanks ATL!

I hate PowerPoint.

The Bad Guy

Part of my job is being the "bad guy"
I hate it and I am bad at it.

To the Client: No, you won't see that work today...
To the Creative Team: No, the deadline isn't moving even though they want to see additional concepts....
To the Print Producer: Oh, there's another change and yes, I know we are on press tomorrow....

Everyone to me: FUCK YOU!!!!

The whole space between a rock and a hard place - awesome.